Have things gone a bit stale in the bedroom? Has sex disappeared from your relationship entirely? Do not fear! It is possible to reignite the spark with your partner. In this Afternoon Live segment, Maegan joins Tra’Renee Chambers to talk about the three simple ingredients that will take your sex life from lackluster to explosive!
Relationships are hard! There are so many moving pieces we have to pay attention to in our relationships – managing finances, kids’ schedules, careers, house repairs, staying connected, the list goes on and on. It’s easy to feel overloaded and neglect your sexual relationship. For many couples who are drowning in the sea of never-ending to-do’s, sex often becomes robotic/routine (aka boring) or disappears entirely.
We believe that it is possible to maintain a healthy and exciting sexual relationship even when we’re overloaded.
While it may feel daunting, a healthy sexual relationship is actually comprised of only three ingredients!
1. Emotional Connection – Feeling emotionally connected is the foundation for a good sex life in long-term relationships. Do you laugh together? Feel like you can lean on each other for support? Do you know what your partner is struggling with right now? These are all components of emotional connection. If they are missing, meaningful sexual connection may be difficult to achieve.
We recommend regular emotional check-ins, date nights, and meeting regularly with your couples therapist to ensure your emotional connection remains solid!
2. Mental Presence – Are you so distracted that you can’t pay attention during sex? Some of the most common distractors are thinking about the to-do list, criticizing your body, or feeling anxious about trying to have sex. The bottom line is this: If we’re not present with our partner during sex, it’s not going to be awesome.
We suggest developing a mindfulness practice to help you combat distractions so that you can be present and connected to your partner in the moment. You can do this at home by using an app like Headspace to learn about and practice mindfulness.
3. Body Awareness – Can you tune-in to different sensations in your body? Do you know what brings you pleasure and what doesn’t feel good to you? If you’re tuned-out of your body, it will be difficult to experience sexual pleasure.
We recommend spending time focusing on what feels good in your body. Start with things than are non-sexual like stretching, taking a hot bath, or eating a delicious meal. Be intentional about sharing pleasurable experiences with your partner while deepening your awareness of what is happening in your physical body. These skills can be applied to your time in the bedroom to help spice up your sexy experience.
Take some time to talk through these three ingredients with your partner. Where do you feel strong and where are you struggling? Work together to fine-tune these ingredients and we believe you will notice an improvement in your emotional and sexual connection!
